On How Marriage is Just Like Traveling

I started thinking about the parallels between marriage and traveling a few weeks ago as I was preparing a toast to give at the wedding of a best friend. The best friend just so happened to be Amanda, map reader extraordinaire.  She caught on to my deplorable map-reading abilities fairly quickly into our first adventure together and well, the rest is history. As she has been a constant travel companion, I knew she would appreciate my references to travel in the toast. It was a wonderful speech indeed---full of memories, encouragement, a few jokes, and even one part spoken all in Spanish. Yup, it was practically the best speech ever.

Best ever, IF I had actually been able to verbalize all of those things. 

That is because I got up in front of everyone and froze. Completely. Froze.

It started out well enough. I said my name, followed by how I knew her. The rest is a blur. All I know is that I couldn't breathe and I felt extremely cold and shivery.  At one point I looked over at her and she nodded encouragingly. The bride should not have to be supporting her matron of honor at such a moment. Geez. Apparently, my primary comfort zone of an audience consists only of 8th graders. Anyway, none of the good stuff I had planned got out. I said a few pithy platitudes, which I am fairly positive included the phrase "I cherish your friendship." Blehh. I hate the word "cherish." It makes me feel.....churlish.

I digress. Here is what I was getting at:

We start out on journeys to lands near and far, and we don't know what  is going to happen between our departure and our return. We can plan all we want, but the truth is, there are just too many variables that are not within our control.  Bad things will probably/definitely happen in some form or fashion, but there are going to be a whole lot more amazing things to make up for it. On any journey, it is best to have a backup plan when things don't go according to vision,  a good friend to call when we are
homesick/sad/broke/freaking out, a rainy day wad of cash, and a clean change of clothes ready for an impromptu adventure out on the town.

Is marriage really any different?

In all of the infinite wisdom I have acquired in my recently minted one official year of marriage, I say nah, it's not really that different.

Congratulations Amanda and Eddie!
And happy first anniversary to my husband. We made it through the "hardest" first year (if I had a dollar for every time I heard that....), on with the rest of them!

These two expressions are interchangeable between us. I often find myself amusing, while he does not, and vice versa.

A Traveler's Regret

There are the travel decisions we love and then there are the travel decisions over which we beat ourselves up. Sometimes the regret is instantaneous, and sometimes it comes to us later when we've had time to mull things over. Either way, the essence of regret means that if given the chance to do it again, we would do it differently. There are a few situations I feel this way about.

Shall we begin with the most recent mental flogging?

Travel Regret #1
I didn't go to Greece with the rest of my friends!!  Some of you who have been following me for at least a year will remember that:
A) this time last year I got married, and,
B)  right before that  I decided it would also be a great time to go to Turkey.
I lived it up in Istanbul for a few days and then came the moment when I departed for the airport to catch a flight home, while the rest of them caught a flight to Greece. Why, why, WHY? It had something to do with being a good little bride-to-be and spending my time finalizing wedding details.
You know what? They went to Greece and had an amazing time (minus those pesky riots) while I was at home, performing the aforementioned "finalizing of the wedding details." Guess who had more fun? Not me. And you know what else? The wedding went off almost without a hitch (minus a caterer who I am trying to purge from memory).  So you see?

Lesson learned: Just go to Greece next time.

Travel Regret #2

Yes, that is me making throw-up faces

I was not at all excited about the food in China or Hong Kong. In fact, this picture at right will demonstrate to you my actual feelings on the matter. At the time, I blamed it on the copious amounts of rice I had eaten during a previous trip traipsing around southeast Asia and had grown increasingly sick of.  As a result, I ate very "safe" foods, minus one endeavor to consume snake on a stick. McDonald's frequently called my name, as did  various other fast food establishments. Never once did I really allow myself to experience and indulge in the flavors of a country that is home to a plethora of savory cuisines.  I am kinda mad at myself for that. Reading other people's blogs doesn't help this regret much.

Lesson learned: Eat whatever the locals eat.

Travel Regret #3
This one is is just plain cringe-worthy and should be blamed on the immaturity of youth and a large amount of alcohol.  After nearly two months on and off the road in Central America, we were back in Antigua, Guatemala for one last week of Spanish school. We stayed at the home of a young woman, who was probably not much older than us. All went well until she asked us for money to pick up some medicine, promising to pay it back the next day.  One of us forked over 100 quetzales (about $13).  The next day she did not have the money, nor had she made dinner (as per what we were paying for in our homestay), apologizing to us that she had been sick and had not had a chance to get the money . No problem. We are human, we understand.  We were not so understanding though a few hours later, when who did we see out dancing the night away in one of Antigua's bumpin' clubs?
You guessed it.
You should have seen the look on her face when she saw us. I approached her, questioning "Estas enferma?" with all the snotty attitude I could muster in a different language. She mumbled something and melted away in the crowd. We went back home after several more hours of drinking and dancing, and collapsed into bed. We were leaving first thing in the morning for Costa Rica and in the haze of the night, we realized one thing: we had been scammed. What to do? Nothing much to do, really. Who can you call? Could we delay a trip for $13-a significant amount when you're on the road for a while? Early morning found us up on the roof, pacing, feeling the effects of the previous eight hours, and trying to figure out a plan. It was then that I honed in on the dozens of glass gallon jars littering her rooftop.  All were clean and clearly being reserved for some purpose.  I glance at the jars, lock eyes with my friend, and in an instant, the plan becomes clear. We proceed to smash nearly every jar on that rooftop, leaving a giant mess of glass shards and fragments.

An alcohol-fueled hissy fit if there ever was one.

Yeah, the woman was wrong to take the money. No doubt about that. But the truth of the matter is that it was $13. Even worse, we were in someone's home, destroying their property. Still worse, perhaps the scene that greeted her later on her own rooftop sowed the seeds of an irreparable stereotype of Americans.

Lesson learned: Get over myself. Also, note to self: Get a grip!

Do these moments define who I am? Not in the least. We travelers pride ourselves on being cultured by our exposure to the world's humanity. Really though, traveling just exposes our own humanity. It is what we do with that unveiled truth that will either make us a good traveler with bad travel moments or an all-around bad traveler. Because yes, there are bad travelers. You know who they are-you've met them.

What about you? Any regrets?

Nica What? Nica Who?

Nicaragua it is!

Me, my trusty new passport with my trusty new name, and my backpack, are jaunting off to Nicaragua next month to spend some quality time in Granada volunteering with La Esperanza Granada, an organization/volunteer group focusing on the education of children.

Now, before I go any further, the title to this post is in fact a direct play on the ever popular Jay-Z and his well-known anthem "Jigga What, Jigga Who."
 Just wanted to clarify for those of you may be less than enthused when it comes to hip-hop.

According to urban dictionary, the definition for this jiggy expression is:
"perplexed exclamation denoting confusion or suprise in reaction to another party's previous statement or action."
Which.........just so happens to be the very same reaction I've been getting from some as I have begun to share my plans with friends and strangers alike.  "But aren't you married? What does your husband think? How can you go away that long? Is he going with you?"

People! Did my life end when I got married? Am I not allowed to travel anywhere now that I have a husband? Am I just supposed to be a happy housewife, dutifully making dinner and cleaning the house? (I totally do both of those things, by the way. Seriously. Just made an extremely tasty dinner last night. If my travel blog doesn't catapult me to success, maybe a dinner blog will). Does a month or so apart make us forget what each other looks like? A month is not going to do anything 'cept make the heart grow fonder.

Thankfully, those responses have been minimal. Most people, including the husband himself, have been quite supportive.

Since he is really the only person who counts, as of about a month from now, I am dusting off  ye olde backpack, hopping on a flight to Managua, followed by a bus to Granada. When I get there, I will be fulfilling yet another travel dream.

Can't wait.

A Sweet Summer Adventure

Summer is a tantalizing five weeks of school away.

Aaaaah sweet summer.

It's what I have lived for since last August. And it's not because I hate my job (I actually love my job). Instead,  for the first time in my life,  I will actually be getting paid to laze the days away. The perks of a putting up with oft snarly teenagers nine months out of the year. 

Did I say laze the days away? Well, not quite.  I just purchased my latest plane ticket and while it will be sweet summertime still, there won't be much lazing going on. I fear it will be quite the opposite as more than likely, I will be up to my ears in small children. This is a volunteer adventure, and it's something I have had my heart set on ever since I learned of the opportunity while on a previous trip. Commitment to the organization and the opportunity was virtually impossible though-as a substitute teacher, it was crucial that I work during the summer to keep me afloat until school started again. Going away for a month or more was out of the question.

Until this year. Woohoo.

In the same spirit of the contest I had with my students prior to my Madrid excursion, I am going to put you all to the test as well. (If you already know my destination then don't chime in!)

See what you can come up with:

This country underwent a bloody revolution in 1979, a year before I was born.

Now isn't that just a happy comforting clue? I have been to this country before, but I did and saw absolutely nothing for the entire week. The exhaustion of a two day bus ride from a country to the north was more than enough to ensure that I was useless for my duration of my stay.  I was content with the Oasis of a hostel, with  its free internet and pool, and came out only to dine on copious amounts of beans and rice, a staple dish of not just this country, but those around it.  And I do mean copious.

Think you know?